This month marks the opening of my new etsy shop, Lazy River Arts. I've put together all of my favorite artistic pursuits in one place and I'm adding more all the time. What an incredibly exciting time, what a crazy time...change. It's funny how change can be both exciting and terrifying at the same time. From full time career to full time artist and business owner. There are lots of cliches about change, and for good reason. It's, well, different. I find it so funny that as human beings we are always longing for change, praying and wishing for some new excitement; a new get away, a new career, house, etc. Then, when the change finally arrives we find ourselves exhilarated at first, and then uncomfortable and questioning.
I find I'm no different. On one hand I am absolutely thrilled, pumped even, to get to wake up every day and do what I love to do - take care of my family and make stuff! It's every artists dream! But then there's the side of me, that "sensible" side telling me that (1.) Work isn't supposed to be this fun (2.) Shouldn't I be doing MORE to bring in income for my family? What was I thinking? and (3.) Wow, this really is a whole lot of work building a business - what was I thinking?
Would I trade this time? NO WAY! But I am surprised at how I've had to really shift my thinking away from the guilt of not bringing in a stable income and the fear of the future to remind myself of the reasons I am doing this in the first place. I am learning and growing as an artist - and, hey, my house hasn't been this clean in a long time. Instead of focusing on the fears that sneak into my conscious and subconscious thoughts, I must purposely hold them hostage, examine them and then remind myself of how glorious it is to be free to explore and to stop wasting my time in worry. After all, I don't know how long/if this time will last. The sensible side with budgets, bills, and family dreams may have to outweigh my dreamy side and I might have to once again squeeze in those moments of creative bliss. For now, I prefer to try to help myself remember the joy of that creative bliss and the blessing it is - and remember to stay sharp when it comes to the thoughts I choose to let dominate my thinking. One fact in particular I choose to remember - though life may change, my Father never does. He is the same today, yesterday, and tomorrow. His love never fails. He will be with me through it all. Praying you find comfort in that today as well.
